


The Golden Aftermath

by kat_fanfic



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Episode Related, First Times, M/M, Romance, h/c
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 09:40:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/796800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kat_fanfic/pseuds/kat_fanfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*** Repost from 852 Prospect***</p><p>Kind of a missing scene for Blind Man's Bluff.<br/>Jim takes care of his guide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Golden Aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this with a gun on my head. Kinda. :) Thanks Nancy!

"Detective Ellison?" 

Jim turned around sharply at the unexpected call. His senses were still sensitive after the overload they'd suffered because of the Golden. While there was still a slightly golden shimmer to everything he saw, at least he _could_ see, something he'd never take for granted again. "Yes, Doc?" 

Doctor Bill Taylor smiled at him, his broad face calm and confident. "Can I speak to you for a moment?" 

Jim nodded, an uneasy feeling rising inside. Blair was supposed to be out of the woods, yet they knew nearly to nothing about the new drug and its consequences. Seeing Blair laying in this hospital bed, hooked up to all this machines and tubes - Jim still shuddered at how close he'd come to losing his guide. 

Pulling himself out of the dark thoughts, he focused on Taylor. Being about ten years his senior, the Doctor was still in excellent shape. He'd been a medic in military, just as Jim, and other than his physician, he considered the gray-haired man a friend. 

"Is Blair alright, Doc?" 

The smile on Taylors face wavered a bit, but his words were soothing. "That was a serious overdose, Jim. He's going to be fine - eventually - but there will be minor problems he'll have to live with in the next weeks. Though, considering the improvement he made over the last couple of days, I'd say he can go home tomorrow. Provided that--" 

"Provided that he gets his rest and plenty of care. I'll see to that, Bill." 

"I know you will. Just make sure that he takes his meds against the cramps and keep him off his feet as long as you can." Taylor smiled knowingly when Jim laughed out loud. 

"I'll try, Doc. That's all I can promise." 

* * *

"Hey Chief. How're you feeling today?" Stepping into the hospital room, Jim immediately zeroed in on his guide's vitals. The heart was still beating a little fast, but that was about to be expected. 

Blair grinned slightly. "Shiny," he croaked, his voice not yet fully recovered from the tubes shoved down his throat. 

Jim snorted at the pun, but couldn't help the answering smile. "That was a bad one, Chief." He sobered instantly, when Blair closed his eyes and paled slightly. "Dizzy again?" Wetting the washcloth lying on the bedside table, Jim gently washed his guide's face. Eventually, a little color returned to Blair's cheeks. 

"Thanks," the younger man mumbled. Jim carefully touched Blair's belly, making sure that he wasn't suffering from cramps. Satisfied that he wasn't in any pain, Jim tried to lighten his friends mood. 

"You know what, Chief?" he said conversationally. Sandburg only smiled up at him, but didn't attempt to open his eyes. "Doc told me you could come home tomorrow." 

That got the younger man's attention. "Really?" 

"Positive. Thank god for your not being overly fond of fast food. A bigger piece of that pizza..." Jim couldn't finish the sentence. 

"Don't thank god for that," Blair whispered sleepily. "'S Naomi's doing." 

Watching his guide fall asleep with a smile on his face, Jim said softly: "That would be not the only think I'd thank her for." 

* * *

First thing the next morning, after confirming Blair's release with Dr. Taylor, Jim breezed into the room, wheelchair on the ready. He didn't even try to hide his pleasure at bringing his partner home. "Ready to go?" he exclaimed cheerfully, earning a groan. 

"Do you have to be so damned happy?" Blair grumbled from his seat on the edge of his bed. 

"I'm just glad that you're okay, Blair," Jim answered patiently, but couldn't keep the slightly hurt tone out of his voice. Blair must have heard it, for he looked up sharply and eventually a smile surfaced on his still-too-pale face. 

"I'm sorry, Jim. I shouldn't snap at you like that," he said with sincere remorse. "Just blame it on the drugs." 

"You sure the Golden didn't affect your sense of humor?" Jim playfully quipped back at his partner. Of course he'd forgiven him instantly. As long as the old Blair was coming back, he'd take the bitching and grumbling willingly. 

The drive back to the Loft was a silent one. While Blair took a nap on the passenger seat, Jim stopped at the pharmacy to fill the prescription. Shaking his head at the variety of pills Sandburg had to take, he threw the little bag to the other groceries he'd picked up before getting Blair. Sitting behind the wheel, Jim automatically checked on his partner. 

He was still sleeping, but it wasn't peaceful. Remembering that the Doc had said something about residual hallucinations, Jim moved to wake Blair up, but the other man reacted before he could. Sitting bolt upright, he looked around wildly. 

Jim laid a calming hand on his partners arm. "It's alright, Chief. Calm down." 

"Jim?" Though his voice shook, the eyes that looked at Jim were lucid. "Shit, that was a bad one." 

"Nightmare?" 

Blair snorted. "More like flashback, man. I knew there was a reason why I don't take manufactured drugs." 

"It will get better, it just takes some time." 

Sighing, Blair nodded and settled back into the blanket that was tightly wrapped around him. Starting the car, Jim watched his friend with growing concern. Ever since the first days at the hospital, Blair had shown a strange reluctance to go asleep. He'd lay awake as long as he could keep his eyes open - talk to everyone within hearing range about everything, just to fight off sleep a little longer. At first, Jim had thought of it as nothing serious, an unknown side effect of the Golden or just the body's reaction to being drugged. But now, having witnessed Blair's distress, he wasn't so sure anymore. 

The few minutes it took them to drive back to the Loft were filled with Blair's yawns and the soft humming of the engine. Parking in front of the building, Jim got out of the car and hurried around it. He came just in time to catch a falling Blair, who was - unsuccessfully - trying to walk on his own. 

"Hey there, chief," he said conversationally, hoisting the solid body upright again. "No kissing the ground today." 

"Jus' lost m' balance for a moment," Blair mumbled into Jim's chest. Grinning at the defiant tone in his partners voice, the detective grabbed the bag with the groceries and locked the car. Keeping a tight hold of Blair, he managed to get him inside and into the elevator. He send a brief thank-you to the deity-in-charge for making it work. Carrying Blair up the stairs wouldn't have been fun, especially for his back. 

Opening the door to apartment 307, Jim carefully maneuvered his exhausted partner into their home, ready to get him in bed immediately. But Blair jerked in his arms as soon as they were in the living room. He opened tired eyes and rubbed them, looking like an adorable five year old. 

"I'm not that tired, Jim," he said, after slowly disentangling himself from the older man. "Can't we just watch TV for a bit?" 

Never one to be overly resistant against the Sandburg-puppy-dog-look, Jim caved instantly. There was something about the way Blair was clinging to him lately that woke every protective instinct he had. Not that that was a bad thing. He'd come to enjoy the physical part of their guide/sentinel relationship immensely, since neither his family nor his ex-wife had been overly touchy-feely. It just satisfied a need in him that he never even knew he _had_. 

So, all in all, he wasn't all that surprised when two hours later found him sitting on the couch with a mostly asleep Blair draped all over him. Emphasis being on _mostly_. 

"Chief." 

"Hum?" The quiet answer was muffled by two pillows, one blanket and Jim's thigh. Feeling his partners warm breath this near to his crotch did more for Jim than he liked to admit - even to himself. It wasn't the fact that Blair was a guy that set all his alarms off. Despite his buff womanizer behavior, Jim _had_ had relationships with men. Just not in the recent past. And that was mostly due to one anthropologist and five whacked out-of-control senses. 

"You're dead on your feet," he said softly, trying to hide his growing excitement in the lower department. "Bedtime, kid." 

Blair sighed, but didn't change his position at all. "'m not on my feet, Jim." 

Jim snorted softly. "Yep, that's because you're using me as a pillow." 

Somehow the light-hearted remark triggered something in Blair, because from one moment to another the younger man was scrambling away from him hastily. "Shit," he exclaimed. "I'm sorry, Jim. I didn't mean to do that, I was just..." 

"Dead on your feet, yes, I know. And I don't mind--" he gestured vaguely at both of them. "--this." 

Blair looked surprised, a shy smile playing around his lips. "Thanks, Jim. You have no idea what that means to me. I don't think I could handle this alone." 

Deeply touched by the sincere feeling in Blair's voice, Jim nodded gruffly and grabbed his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. "You're welcome, Chief." 

* * *

Despite all his efforts, from warm milk with honey to talking about drugs and their effects on the human body, Blair didn't sleep. He'd nap for a few minutes, but as soon as he entered the REM phase, he'd sit up with a strangled gasp, Jims name on his lips. 

Finally, when it began to darken outside, Ellison made one last attempt. Taking a deep breath, he asked silently, "Wanna come upstairs with me? Maybe that would help." 

Blair stared at him a long time, his face unreadable. Just when Jim was beginning to ask himself if he'd just made the biggest mistake of his whole life, the younger man shook his head. "That's a generous offer, but no, thanks. I'll try to meditate and hopefully that'll do the trick. Night, Jim." 

Feeling disappointed and relieved at the same time, Jim went to bed. 

* * *

"Oh, come on, Jim. Knock it off. I'm fine!" Blair was slowly but steadily going insane. Everywhere he turned upon getting up this morning, Jim was there, hovering and watching him for every sign of discomfort. Though it was kinda nice to know that the older man cared so much, it wasn't exactly something Blair was used to. 

Somehow Jim seemed to understand what was going on in his head, he only gave a little self-depreciating smile and held up his hands in a non-threatening manner. "Just making sure that you take your meds. Remember those? Little pills, bad taste, have to be swallowed?" 

Blair looked disgusted. "Yes, Jim Nightingale. Got some water for them?" 

Not daring to grin openly, Jim produced a glass with orange juice instead. Unable to suppress the happy sigh at the treat, Blair made like swallowing the pills. In the last moment though, just as he were about to pop them into his mouth, he stopped. 

"Um, Jim?" 

"What?" 

"Why are there six pills instead of five in my hand?" 

"Because they're all yours?" 

Blair squinted his eyes dangerously. 

Jim swallowed. 

"Is this a sleeping pill?" Sandburg asked in a quiet voice that made the older cop nervous as hell. 

Trying to cover his uneasiness at being caught, Jim moved to the offense. "Damnit, Blair! You hardly slept at all last night and don't you dare try to tell me anything else. These--" he pointed to his ears, "--don't lie. Now take the fucking pill and _sleep_!" 

Taking a deep breath after his outburst, Jim watched his partner grow very still. Bracing himself for his very own version of the Sandburg wrath, he waited a little anxiously for the storm to break lose. But it never came. 

Instead, to Jim's complete mortification, a tear slid slowly down Blair's cheek. After a second, the younger man looked up from his place on the couch, fear plainly visible in his eyes. "I can't sleep. I just... can't. Everytime I close my eyes..." the words came to a hold as Blair brought up one hand to fiercely rub the liquid from his face. "It feels like I'm all alone, stumbling around, and all I can see are burning people and guns. Shit, Jim, do you have any idea how easily I could have killed you in that garage?" 

Jim couldn't bear the raw pain in Blair's voice. Doing the only thing that seemed to help his friend, he took the lithe body in his arms. Rocking him like he'd once had his little brother, Jim buried his hands in the wild locks and held on. Hard sobs shook Blair as all of a sudden fear, pain and humiliation came crushing down on him. 

They sat there for a long time, totally wrapped up into each other. Gradually the tears ended, as did the violent shivers. Even though he knew that it was time to let go, Jim was reluctant to do so. Almost losing Blair - to a _drug_ , for god's sake - had changed his whole perception of the world he lived in. Sure, his senses were mostly under control now, as were the zone-outs. But did that mean that he didn't need his guide anymore? 

That life was acceptable without Blair Sandburg in it? 

Hell, no. 

And in this moment, Jim realized that he loved Blair. That he was _in love_ with his best friend, who was currently bundled up in his arms, sound asleep. 

Softly chuckling to himself, Jim moved in a more comfortable position, careful not to wake the younger man. 

"Don't worry," he whispered. "I'll watch your sleep." 

* * *

Watching Blair putting on his coat a few days later, Jim couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. Not with Blair, never that. It was himself that made him feel like that. In spite of his realization of the feelings he had for his partner, the other man was still clueless, due to Jim's incapability of saying 'It' out loud. 

Jim hated being a coward. 

When Blair asked about his vision, he answered distractedly, desperately trying to find a way to say the words. He knew he could say them, had done so a few times in his life. Even though he'd never meant them with all his heart, like he did now. God, he loved Blair. 

Something his guide was saying penetrated the fog of confused thoughts, at the same time he heard the light knock on the door. "That'd be Margaret." 

Jim surged upwards and hastily moved to stand in front of Blair. "What's she doing here?" His heart was hammering inside his chest and he was glad that Blair didn't have Sentinel hearing. 

Blair smiled a little, and something briefly flickered over his expressive face. It was too fast gone for Jim to identify it. "Well, you know what," the younger man said softly, "I just realized it's crazy for me to try to keep you guys apart. So, uh, I'm giving you both my blessing." 

Head reeling with the _wrongness_ of this, Jim scrambled for words. All he managed though, was a repeated "Wait!" while he still stood between Blair and the door, like he could keep this from happening physically. 

"What's the matter? Are you afraid that her inner beauty just isn't going to be enough for you, Jim?" Blair sounded strange, almost forced. 

Jim shook his head slowly, trying to come up with something that would make Blair understand. "No," was the first word that tumbled out of his mouth. Good start, Ellison. "Come on, man. I lied to her. I mean I deceived her." True, but it wasn't enough. He knew that Blair thought he meant the whole not-seeing thing, even though he was speaking about his love for someone else. 

"So make it up to her," Blair answered, using his guide voice. That was when Jim realized how hard it had to be for Blair, bringing two of his friends together, knowing that they could get hurt because of it. And he was right, Margaret would be hurt. Damn. 

Still trying to find a way out, Jim babbled distractedly, "Well, tell me, honestly. How unattractive is she?" If she was, then it would be hell to let her down now, after their first date. "No. Forget it. Forget it. I don't care. No, should I?" 

He saw irritation on Blair's face, along with hurt. " No. You shouldn't. You ready?" 

Please, please, no. Don't open the door. Jim was panicking and he knew it. " No, it's..." he stammered, only to be interrupted by his almost angry guide. 

"You ready?" he said and blew out three little puffs of breath as he opened the door. Even though it was a mocking gesture, Jim felt himself relaxing. He could do it. He'd tell Margaret the truth, hoping she would understand. 

And she would, Jim realized in the instant the door revealed the dark-haired woman. Kind eyes gazed up at him, as she murmured a soft "Hi." 

"Hi," he answered, a little distracted by the golden glow that surrounded her. A soft pat on the shoulder brought him out of the almost-zone and then Blair was walking down the hallway, away from him. 

In a surge of desperation, Jim called out a frantic, "Chief! Don't go!" 

Startled, the younger man halted and came back, confusion visible on his face. Still a bit pale, Jim noticed the little lines around the eyes of his guide. He was better, but still not fully recovered from the drugs that had played havoc with his system. 

"What is it, Jim?" 

Eyes darting between Margaret and Blair, Jim felt a headache starting behind his forehead. Migraines! That was it! Showing the little smile he always used when he wanted something from Blair, he asked in a strained voice. "You still having this Chinese herb pain pills?" 

Instantly Blair's expression was one of concern. It made Jim feel guilty for playing his guide like this. But he couldn't help himself, the desire to be near the young man overwhelmed him and made him temporarily forget the woman standing in front of him. 

"Sure, Jim. Let me get them." He swept past them and Jim could hear him rummaging through the drawers in his room. A small sound brought his attention back to Margaret, who was grinning at him. Uncomfortably, Jim said, "Maybe it's better if we meet another time, Margaret. It was nice seeing you, but..." 

Still grinning that mega-watt smile, she winked at him. Jim felt a twinge of regret. He really liked her, especially her voice. It's rich sound, which reminded him of-- his thoughts came to a stumbling hold as he realized what - or whom - her voice reminded him of. 

Blair. The same husky quality, the same calming timbre that soothed something deep inside of Jim. 

"It's okay, Jim," she said suddenly, in exactly the same tone that Blair had used earlier. The Guide tone. A bit startled by that, Jim nearly missed Margaret's next words, only to stare at her in shock as they, finally, penetrated. 

"Take care of him." And with that she turned and disappeared into the elevator. Jim watched her go, his mouth gaping open. Now that'd been easy. 

"Hey, where's Margaret?" Blair asked suddenly from behind him. 

Jim turned to his partner. "I think she's a guide!" He blurted out, only to berate himself as an expression of excruciating pain took hold of Blair's features. 

"She... She is?" He said, sounding like he was about to break into a million pieces. 

Not able to bear Blair's pain one second longer, Jim crossed the distance quickly and pulled his partners trembling body in for a tight hug. "Yes, I'm sure. And she's smart enough to know that this Sentinel is taken." 

Waiting for the reaction he knew was coming, Jim grinned in expectation. He wasn't disappointed. 

"What did you say?" Pulling back, Blair gazed up at him, confusion replacing the pain. 

Quickly schooling his features, not wanting to make Blair feel like he was mocking him, Jim locked his gaze with his guides, feeling an odd pulse racing through him. Yes, his whole being seemed to scream, finally. 

"I said this Sentinel is taken, Chief. That is, if you want me," with a sense of finality, Jim took all his courage and said, "I love you." 

The words seemed to echo in the silent loft as he stared down at this speechless partner. A sinking feeling took hold of Jim. What if he'd just ruined everything? As far as he knew Blair wasn't into guys, what if-- 

He never finished that thought, wrapped up as he was in the surprisingly strong hold of Blair's arms. "I love you, too, Jim. So much!" 

He barely had enough time to register the whispered words, before impossibly soft lips covered his in a gentle kiss. Moaning at the contact, Jim deepened it, pushing his tongue into the hot cavern. Desperate for more, Jim grabbed Blair's ass with both hands, pulling them flush together. He felt a bit light-headed from the lack of oxygen and the fact that all his blood seemed to rush into his instantly hard cock. 

Rubbing frantically against his guides pliant body, never breaking the kiss, Jim felt himself approaching orgasm in record time. It just was so good, knowing that it was Blair he had in his arms, that he was _willing_. That he loved him. 

Finally pulling back and gasping for air, Jim took a moment to check on his partner. Yep, hard and needy, with a dazed expression on his face, lips swollen, Blair looked positively debauched. Stifling a roar of passion, Jim yanked first his, then Blair's pants open, freeing their hard erections just enough to bring them together. 

Blair made a low keening sound as Jim wrapped his hand around both of them. "God, yes. Oh, oh, Jim. Please..." 

Listening to the incoherent babbling, the older man set a fast pace, stroking their cocks hard and quick. He could feel Blair reaching his climax, felt the seemingly impossible further hardening of his cock, the speeding pulse and racing heartbeat. Harsh pants turned to words and with a soft cry of his name, Blair came, his whole body shuddering with the spurts. Feeling the wetness against his fingers, Jim surrendered to his own orgasm, jerking against his partner in helpless ecstasy. 

When he came to, it was to Blair's quiet laughter against his chest. Still wrapped into each other, none made an attempt of separating. 

"What's so funny?" Jim finally asked with a grin. At least he knew that Blair didn't have second thoughts. 

Blair lifted his head from where it'd been buried in Jims shirt and looked up. Holding his breath at the beautiful smile on his guides face, the Sentinel memorized it, taking in every nuance for later reference. 

"Look at us," Blair said. "Making out like teenagers. We didn't even take off the pants!" 

Returning the grin, Jim sighed in deep contentment. "I guess it's time for a new house rule," he exclaimed, chuckling at the suspicious expression on his lovers face. 

"No making out with our pants on?" 

He was still smiling, but his voice was serious when he answered. "No holding back. On anything." 

Sensing the importance of this, Blair grew serious. "Never. I love you, Jim." Briefly closing his eyes, Jim savored the moment, inhaling his partners musky scent, mingled with his own. 

And for once, the world was quiet.


End file.
